Facing Your Fears, Living Your Best Life

Have you ever wondered how your life would be different if you had no fear? Perhaps some of you have no fear already. If so, I say good for you, no need to keep reading. For me, however, I have plenty of fear and sometimes it stops me from living life to the fullest. I'd like to stop that from happening so as an exercise in overcoming my fear, and hopefully inspiring you to overcome yours, I will share with you how I have taken a step in facing my fear.

This past weekend I went rock climbing outside for the first time. I had been to a rock climbing gym several times before, about 2 years ago, but had never climbed an actual rock with rope outdoors. To my horror and surprise, I was told by my husband that rock climbers start from the top, rappel down, then climb back up. Now think about this for a second. Imagine you've never rock climbed outside before, you're facing the side of a cliff and you're told that you are about to walk down the side of that cliff backwards having no idea what the side of the cliff looks like nor knowing what's down there at the bottom. Well, this was me Saturday morning. I looked at my husband and said, are you crazy!?! Walking down a cliff backwards with only a rope and a harness! He smiled and very calmly asked, "Lauren, do you believe in yourself?" Honestly, I wasn't sure at that point. I didn't want to say yes, but I also didn't want to say no. I asked if I could climb down around the side to see what the side of the cliff looked like before rappelling down. He said no. At this point my hands were sweaty and my heart was fluttering a little. I could feel the acid rising in my stomach. Then Andrew, my husband, said, "Lauren, you have to believe in yourself and you have to trust yourself. If you don't believe in yourself what do you have? What do you stand for?" Okay, I thought. Don't over think this. You wanted to do this now do it. Lots of other people have done it and were fine. I took a deep breath, strapped myself in, and began to lower myself down the side of the cliff. It was scary at first, but then I relaxed a little, trusting my hands to guide the rope through the ATC. I reached the bottom in no time and thought, hey, that was no big deal! Actually, that was even a little bit fun!

Rock climbing has taught me to trust in myself and my abilities. It has a way of slowing you down and forcing you to focus on what's immediately ahead of you, not the bump 3 feet ahead or the mountain you are attempting to climb, but what's immediately  in front of you. This is a very effective tool that can be applied to any other aspect of life, for example, your career, loosing those few extra pounds, finishing a degree, or just getting past a difficult situation. If you step back and look at the mountain it would be easy to give up before even trying. But if you don't let yourself over think it and if you focus on the very next step, before you know it, you're at the top wondering how you got there. Finally, rock climbing has taught me that most everything in life is 90% mental and 10% physical. Perception really is everything. Change your mind and you can change your world.

That feeling of accomplishing something you never thought possible is exhilarating and inspiring. So, here's to living your best life, trusting and believing in yourself, and not letting fear get in your way!

Oh, and by the way, the rest of the day was a blast! I lost a few layers of skin on two of my fingers, but it was well worth it.

“If you live each day as if it were your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” -Steve Jobs

New Beginnings

For many, this June marks the celebration of a grand accomplishment, and the start of a new chapter. Whether graduating from high school or college, graduation is the recognition of the hard work it’s taken to get you to this place. It is also a time of great excitement as plans are made for the future. Although I am not a graduate this June, many around me are – numerous friends, and boyfriend, joined thousands of others to walk across a stage to receive their diploma.

While I’m not a graduate this June, I’m inspired by those who are – whether they’re planning a summer trip, starting a new job or looking forward to a grad program in the fall – I am reminded that no matter where you are in life, it is never too late to dream, to change paths or to pursue what you love.  

6 years later, Paulo graduates with his PhD

Make Yourself

I've always liked Nike's advertising. I find that the company's ads resonate with me. Sometimes, during a long and particularly challenging run, I catch myself thinking, just do it Lauren, just do it. It reminds me to stop making up excuses, to focus on the challenge and goal at hand, to bite the bullet if you will, and just do it.

I've lived in northern Virginia for a little over a year now. In addition to adjusting to a new industry and job, I've also had to adapt to the traffic and my daily commute. Growing up I would hear people talk about congested areas like Los Angeles and other parts of southern California, but I never took the time to really stop and think about what it meant for those people who drive an hour or two one way to work every day...until I moved to NoVa. This has been by far one of the most challenging adjustments I've had to get used to. With this new lifestyle I also found myself working long hours, with little free time left for myself during the week. I've been an avid runner since I was in the 8th grade, running 4-5 times a week, every week, year after year. Even in graduate school I would make time to run even if it meant staying up an hour later and even if I had only gotten 4 hours of sleep the night before. But I was finding that fitting in time to run was difficult in northern Virginia, and the less I got to run the more miserable I started to feel.

Not only was it difficult to find time to run, I kept making excuses for myself. If I went running after work it meant running as late as 8 or 9pm, depending on when I got done with work. If 8 or 9pm was too late then that meant that the only other option was in the morning. Anyone close to me will tell you, I'm a sleeper and have the hardest time getting out of bed. I tried several times to get up to workout in the morning and I just couldn't do it. On top of that, I would have to run on a treadmill. In January it's dark outside from 5pm until by 7am and as a female there was no way I'd be taking any chances with my safety. But the problem with a treadmill was that 1. I hated running on a treadmill 2. You don't burn as many calories running on a treadmill, and 3. Running outside is just so much better. Can you see where I'm going with this...

Then, one day in February, after deciding that I had felt sorry for myself long enough, I got the idea to post a flyer at my gym to see if anyone would like to start a running group. I asked the manager at the gym, who said yes thankfully, posted the flyer, and a few days later I got an email from someone. That someone happened to be a female and about my age who was at the same running speed and fitness level as me. I was thrilled! To make things even better, she has turned out to be a great friend.

My new running partner and I decided to meet 3 days a week and to run about 5 miles every time. I will admit, it was difficult at first to get myself out of bed and my body felt tired and strained running in the early hours of the morning. My initial approach was to take it day by day. I didn't let myself think about the entire week at once, I just focused on the next step I needed to take. Now that I've been at it for about 4 months it's not hard anymore. It's become a part of my routine and my favorite way to start the day. Sometimes I'm still a little surprised that I get myself up at 5:40am to go running. I'm proud that I was proactive to take responsibility for my own happiness when it would have been so much easier to blame everything else in my life. I'm also proud that I actually followed through with something that initially seemed so hard, yet was so easy, like getting my butt out of bed in the morning.

The Nike ad is a powerful message that I am responsible for taking care of myself. It's also a reminder that my life is entirely up to me. It's up to me to decide who I will be, how I will live my life and how I will let my experiences shape me. And the same is true for you.

Tapas

During a recent 10-day trip to southern Spain, in addition to site seeing and relaxing, I spent a good amount of time enjoying the local cuisine. The majority of our 10 days was spent in the Andalucía region, located in the southernmost part of the Iberian Peninsula, bordering the Mediterranean Sea. Being surrounded by the Mediterranean, it’s no surprise that seafood is a main staple of the local gastronomy – some local favorites include sardinas (sardines), bacalao (salted cod), paella de mariscos (paella with shellfish), merluza (hake) and pescaíto frito (deep-fried fish in olive oil, seasoned with salt). 

While you can buy fish at the grocery store, you can also find it at markets, such as el Mercado Central (featured above), in Málaga. I personally found the markets much more fun to explore than the grocery stores, as they're filled with a variety of colors and smells - and if you're lucky, a vendor just might let you sample what they're selling.

In addition to snacking on local treats found at the markets, throughout the week we tried a variety of different tapas. Now, you may be asking: what are tapas? From my experience, tapas can be almost anything, served as a snack size portion. Some of my favorites, and most commonly found on menus throughout Andalucía, include tortilla española (spanish omelette), pan tostado con jamón Serrano (bread with Serrano ham), pimientos de Padrón (deep-fried or roasted chili peppers) and berenjena frita (deep-fried aubergines) - all washed down with a glass of sangría.

Tapas